One week old

Well....we are only a few days in, and things are going well. First off thanx to everyone for the wishes, and such....I am so overwhelmed..I would say that i still cant believe it, but i am so tired i can't see straight. This is funny because i haven't been sleeping well the past couple months, and i figured the universe was preparing me for this...Not even close....

Last week at this time i was sitting in my house that was clean and you could see the living room floor...now...there is a cradle, a swing, a car seat, blankets, diapers and my kitchen has been invaded by bottles. Who would have thought...I know this is what i wanted..but it is still sinking in. Here is the thing, when you are pregnant you know about when the child will be here, what it is, or at least you know you are going to have a newborn, so you know what you need and how to prepare. I got a phone call at 12:30 in the afternoon, and by 6 I am home with a 3 day old baby boy. Its amazing...

Everyday is such a new thing...the smiles he gives (OK i know that it is gas...let me think what i want) or he grips my finger while he is eating...and the weight of this is not lost....this little thing depends on me for EVERYTHING...OMG...And even though I seem to be so tired all the time, that my eyes seem to always be drooping, those little noises he makes, is all worth it.(for now anyway..lol)

I find myself being so paranoid about everything. For the first day or so, I checked to see if he was breathing every 5 minutes. Or if he is eating enough, and gaining weight, or the fact that he didn't poop yesterday, is that something i need to call the advice nurse for? or can i take him out, or let all my friends who want to come see him, do so. He does have some medical stuff, and it is cold and flu season..and...and...So many little things, and i know its trial and error...but still...so for those of you who are mothers, i may be calling you in a panic.

The good news is that he went to the doc on Friday and he said that he is doing really well. He saw him shortly after he was born an remembered him. I may as well have given birth to this kid, he is a great eater and likes to watch TV.

I took him to Home Depot the other day and as we were wandering i was thinking that his mother could be anywhere, which is funny seeing i do what i do. such a strange experience this is...and we are only at the beginning...

i typed most of this one handed because my boy is in the other one...sorry about the mistakes, plus i am sleep deprived...