Saturday, September 24, 2011

Let down...once again...

I first want to say sorry to my family and friends for a few things...
1.  That I once again got every one's hopes up
2.  That I am cranky, unmotivated, and probably not much fun to talk to or be around...

I am sure there is more...but that's all i can think of now.  Yet again I was let down this week, and i swore i wasn't going to tell anyone, or get any ones hopes up, or mine for that matter....but i was hoping if i put it out into the universe this time, that would be better luck.  Obviously not...

I was reading my posts from a year ago, and I was sooooo optimistic, excited, and ready for anything that came my way in this process.  Who would have thought i would be here a year later... very few phone calls with children ready to come to my home, a fully decorated empty, nursery and a broken heart.

Before everyone freaks out...I will be fine...just somehow need to get out of this funk.  I know it will all be worth it later on..and I will continue to try to have a positive attitude, but I know there will be bad days. 

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