Parenthood Party!!

What a truly AWESOME day!!  Before I go any further, I want to say again to Darby and Cari, you guys rock....thank you so much for today...it was perfect!!!  You guys are the best...and feel blessed to have friends like you in my life....my future child will be lucky to have you as Auntie's.

Second to everyone who came today to share in this joyous and stressful event.  Your gifts will be used wisely i promise...it all makes the room more inviting for this child.  I had my mother there, who gave me a blanket that she made....a long time ago, when i was born.  She gave it to my niece and it has returned to me...I am truly thankful for my mother, and know that because of her I will follow in her foot steps and be a great mommy!!  Here is a pic of that beautiful blanket....

I had my second and third families there....and many great friends....we had great conversations, a lot of laughs, and all of you inspire me to be a great person, and an even better mother.

Here is a pic of the beautiful quilt that Barb B made for me....As soon as she heard about what i was doing she was on it...i am truly honored that she took the time to make this....

Here's a few more pics of all the stuff i had to find a place for....

And OMG Cari who is soooooo crafty, it makes me so jealous...made this cute diaper cake(great because now i have 3 sizes of diapers) btw those are "Mums" on it...hahaha...and the picture board which she also made...it will be an awesome addition to the room...

Finally my super cute new diaper bag...which has circles on it, which for some reason i am obsessed with.  And if you look closely at the straps on the car seat...it has monkeys on the straps...so cute...

(Sorry that all the pics are up here like this...but i cant quite figure out how to change it)

As for the actual process....this is is so grueling...and i wait every day for a call...and it hasn't come yet.  I had to decline children this week, a 4 yr old girl and her 1.5 yr old brother (yup..that's two at the same time)   But it seems that they were still looking at relatives for placement, and if i have some control over my risk of heartache...i will do so....i do feel guilty...and feel like i should just do it so that i can get on with it, and have the kid and figure out parenting...but then i want to hang in there and hope that the right child will find its way into my home.  Just because i decline children, doesn't make me lower on any list or anything, or hurt my chances of a child, so no worries there.

This week i had lunch with a bunch of people for a birthday (Happy birthday again Deb) and was talking with an adoptive mother.  She had her own children and decided to adopt from China.  That process is different then what i am doing, i was more curious about raising the child and how she feels about her.  She said that even though she didn't give birth to her, that child is hers and she would do anything for her.  she said that her hair is dyed black because her daughter wanted to know why her hair wasn't the same color.  She said that she doesn't feel any differently about her daughter than she does about her boys, and said that she thinks she is even more protective of her.  You could see in her eyes that she loves that little girl...and for me...that help me know that even though i wont be giving birth, that i will still be able to bond and love a child even though we have no biological connection.  Anyone can have a baby and be a mother, but it takes special people to be a mommy. 

Deb said today that they told the little girl that she didn't come from her mommy's tummy, but came from her heart....with that...good night...and thanx again to everyone...