Today, I feel great about my choice in daycare. We walk in and someone always acknowledges us, we walk down the hall and everyone always gushes over Jace, and he seems to like the people there. This morning, one of his teachers, who was promoted and wont be in the classroom much longer :( said to me that she was so happy that the baby found me..and that we are perfect together, and she couldnt see him with anyone else. Then when i went to pick him up, the other teacher said that he is starting to look like me..LOL..i thought they said that about dogs...anyway, thought i would just share...i know that picking a day care is a big decision, and i feel like maybe this was one of the first right choices i made in being a mother, and that feels great.
So the 60 days for the appeal is coming up on May 7th. The usually wait a week or so, then we can set a date for the meeting that we fill out paperwork, file it and then get a date. I can't believe it, it could happen by late May or early June...i hope anyway.
I can't believe how fast he is growing...he officially crawling, and fast!!! Poor cat...he has even tried to get to him under the table which is where he hides. My mom says i should move the chairs out so he doesn't hit his head, but i feel like the poor cat needs some line of defense. The baby gate has come in handy, and it is so funny to watch him, like a little inmate bang on the bars...and on top of that he is trying to stand up...
Nothing else exciting...I am taking him to the zoo this weekend...should be fun...
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Friday, April 20, 2012
Daydreaming
This week has basically been a bust....so i have been sitting here daydreaming... Just something short....staring at a pic i have up from our recent photo shoot, of him and I.... Thought going thru my mind...
Man, I love that kid...
Have a great weekend....
Man, I love that kid...
Have a great weekend....
Sunday, April 15, 2012
6 months
Wow, I didn't realize that i haven't written anything in a few weeks. Sorry for that, but apparently things get busy and tired when you have a child. Who knew??!!
So since the last time, the kiddo has turned 6 months. This seems to be a big time in his growth and a lot has happened in a short period of time. So first the basics, went to the doctor and he is 17lbs 9oz and 26 inches. Still in the 50th percentile for weight and 25th for height. I asked the doctor a question, part of me was joking and of course the other part was i was really worried. I asked her if he is going to be a dwarf. He has this long torso, and teeny tiny legs...if he were to start walking now, he would look funny. Of course she said no, that he was on his curve just fine. Whew...He had his last of his baby shots, and i was prepared for the worst. He seemed to handle them well, and i never saw any side affects. Dr. did a TB test because of the egg donors choices, but luckily it is negative. I can't believe with all his health issues and things that were against him when he was born, i have this adorable, healthy baby boy.
He is also sitting on his own. For a week or so it was that someone had to sit him up, but within the last few days he can now be on his tummy and sit up on his own. It is fun to watch for sure, but man he is strong...with that he is now mobile, and i expect him to crawl for real in the next few weeks. Right now it is army crawl/inch worm. He can get up on his knees and rock back and forth and even get on hs tiptoes, but when its time to move, he flops on the floor and off he goes. He has found the cat. When the cat comes over, or walks by, he screeches (the baby not the cat)and then takes off after him. I am hoping my 25lb cat will lose some weight from running from him. The baby has snuck up on the cat a few times, and gets his tail. He is gentle with the cat, and just screeches. Diezel looks at me for help, when i don't step in, he takes off. It is so much fun to watch the baby explore and figure things out on his own. He is exploring sounds, and is very talkative, likes to laugh, and seems to have picked up on the "G" sound, even though i tried hard for "ma". At least it wasn't "dad." LOL
Third thing is he has 1 tooth coming thru. It has come thru, because now when he wants to bite my finger, it hurts! Ithas just poked thru, but adorable to look at him smile, and see the little white tooth popping up. I really expected more to the teething, of course he has a bunch more to go, so i am sure that it wont be like this everytime. He is drooling a lot, and everything goes in his mouth, of course, but other than that no fever, or pain. He does continue to scratch at his face which is driving me crazy. He has also started eating food. We started out with peas....at first he didn't seem to like them, but once i started mixing them with cereal things went better. We started applesauce today and he seems to like that.
One last thing that has developed, is his temper. OMG....He threw a tantrum the other day because he wanted his bottle that i was fixing, screaming, hands going, out of control. Its funny now, but boy are we going to nip that early...but of course he gives me that smile, shoulders up..laughing, and i melt.
This weekend we went camping for the first time with his Auntie Darby and Uncle Calvin. It wasn't camping camping, but it was fun. We stayed in their trailer, but there was no wood fires allowed, so it wasn't camping. Sat night we had to give the baby a warm bath in the sink, because he was having gas issues, and screaming and crying..and it wasn't his normal scream...luckily i was well prepared, had gas drops and within 10 minutes he was feeling better, he had a midnight bath, and a photo shoot with Uncle Cal..LOL...it was great...i think Jace's favorite part was when his Auntie was feeding him peas, and it was all over her, in his hair, on his clothes, feet, hands and nose. Overall a good expereince...
We are about a month and some into the 60 day appeal period, and then we can go fromn there. Will keep you posted.
So since the last time, the kiddo has turned 6 months. This seems to be a big time in his growth and a lot has happened in a short period of time. So first the basics, went to the doctor and he is 17lbs 9oz and 26 inches. Still in the 50th percentile for weight and 25th for height. I asked the doctor a question, part of me was joking and of course the other part was i was really worried. I asked her if he is going to be a dwarf. He has this long torso, and teeny tiny legs...if he were to start walking now, he would look funny. Of course she said no, that he was on his curve just fine. Whew...He had his last of his baby shots, and i was prepared for the worst. He seemed to handle them well, and i never saw any side affects. Dr. did a TB test because of the egg donors choices, but luckily it is negative. I can't believe with all his health issues and things that were against him when he was born, i have this adorable, healthy baby boy.
He is also sitting on his own. For a week or so it was that someone had to sit him up, but within the last few days he can now be on his tummy and sit up on his own. It is fun to watch for sure, but man he is strong...with that he is now mobile, and i expect him to crawl for real in the next few weeks. Right now it is army crawl/inch worm. He can get up on his knees and rock back and forth and even get on hs tiptoes, but when its time to move, he flops on the floor and off he goes. He has found the cat. When the cat comes over, or walks by, he screeches (the baby not the cat)and then takes off after him. I am hoping my 25lb cat will lose some weight from running from him. The baby has snuck up on the cat a few times, and gets his tail. He is gentle with the cat, and just screeches. Diezel looks at me for help, when i don't step in, he takes off. It is so much fun to watch the baby explore and figure things out on his own. He is exploring sounds, and is very talkative, likes to laugh, and seems to have picked up on the "G" sound, even though i tried hard for "ma". At least it wasn't "dad." LOL
Third thing is he has 1 tooth coming thru. It has come thru, because now when he wants to bite my finger, it hurts! Ithas just poked thru, but adorable to look at him smile, and see the little white tooth popping up. I really expected more to the teething, of course he has a bunch more to go, so i am sure that it wont be like this everytime. He is drooling a lot, and everything goes in his mouth, of course, but other than that no fever, or pain. He does continue to scratch at his face which is driving me crazy. He has also started eating food. We started out with peas....at first he didn't seem to like them, but once i started mixing them with cereal things went better. We started applesauce today and he seems to like that.
One last thing that has developed, is his temper. OMG....He threw a tantrum the other day because he wanted his bottle that i was fixing, screaming, hands going, out of control. Its funny now, but boy are we going to nip that early...but of course he gives me that smile, shoulders up..laughing, and i melt.
This weekend we went camping for the first time with his Auntie Darby and Uncle Calvin. It wasn't camping camping, but it was fun. We stayed in their trailer, but there was no wood fires allowed, so it wasn't camping. Sat night we had to give the baby a warm bath in the sink, because he was having gas issues, and screaming and crying..and it wasn't his normal scream...luckily i was well prepared, had gas drops and within 10 minutes he was feeling better, he had a midnight bath, and a photo shoot with Uncle Cal..LOL...it was great...i think Jace's favorite part was when his Auntie was feeding him peas, and it was all over her, in his hair, on his clothes, feet, hands and nose. Overall a good expereince...
We are about a month and some into the 60 day appeal period, and then we can go fromn there. Will keep you posted.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
No offense
So i am kind of in the dark about the process from here. My social worker from the foster agency said that they have an adoption worker who will do the paperwork to finalize. It sounds like i cant pick a day but will get a pick of a day that the court has open, and its first thing in the morning or 1 in the afternoon.
Honestly i am ready for this to be over. I am sick of keeping my house spotless (mind you i put it on myself)in case someone stops by, or having to arrange my schedule so that i can be home for someone to come and do a home visit. I get it...i soooo get it, and am glad that this process has gone so quickly, but its old. Again, I so get what our clients go thru, they think the same thing everyday. I guess for me its a little different than my clients, I havent done anything wrong. I let social workers come in my house and check, gave them every ounce of my life story, which was put on 15 pages, and suffered through numerous calls to "turn down" children, or even get my hopes up for other ones. And yet I still have to let this go on. The social worker is going to see the baby at daycare today or tomorrow. The daycare knows what is going on, and really its not a big deal, but why does he need to be seen there? I technically dont even have a county social worker, have never received a social security card or a Medi-Cal card that has his birth name on it. I got a bill from the doctors office who said i owe $945 for shots!! FYI those things are expensive. I called and gave them the number, but shouldn't that be already on file?? I can tell dealing with Medi-Cal will be interesting. I am going to try to put him on my dental, because i refuse to deal with Access Dental. Of course now all of that doesn't matter, because his name will be legally changed so now its not worth making a stink.
*Breathe* Totally unmotivated today...i know that when i go pick him up and he smiles at me, it will make things better....but until then...
Honestly i am ready for this to be over. I am sick of keeping my house spotless (mind you i put it on myself)in case someone stops by, or having to arrange my schedule so that i can be home for someone to come and do a home visit. I get it...i soooo get it, and am glad that this process has gone so quickly, but its old. Again, I so get what our clients go thru, they think the same thing everyday. I guess for me its a little different than my clients, I havent done anything wrong. I let social workers come in my house and check, gave them every ounce of my life story, which was put on 15 pages, and suffered through numerous calls to "turn down" children, or even get my hopes up for other ones. And yet I still have to let this go on. The social worker is going to see the baby at daycare today or tomorrow. The daycare knows what is going on, and really its not a big deal, but why does he need to be seen there? I technically dont even have a county social worker, have never received a social security card or a Medi-Cal card that has his birth name on it. I got a bill from the doctors office who said i owe $945 for shots!! FYI those things are expensive. I called and gave them the number, but shouldn't that be already on file?? I can tell dealing with Medi-Cal will be interesting. I am going to try to put him on my dental, because i refuse to deal with Access Dental. Of course now all of that doesn't matter, because his name will be legally changed so now its not worth making a stink.
*Breathe* Totally unmotivated today...i know that when i go pick him up and he smiles at me, it will make things better....but until then...
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
The rights....they have been terminated!!!
As i sit here watching Jace play on his own, roll over and army crawl across the floor, i am realizing that this is my child, and I will have to provide for, protect, discipline and love for the rest of my life...And this could not make me any more happy...
So the really tough stuff is over, i think. Again i arrived early at court (cuz i am a Hornstein) and i sit down in the lobby, alone for about 15 minutes. Every time the elevator bell rang, i looked, nothing. I did every thing i could to make sure that the mother, or father for that matter didn't walk out of one of those 3 elevators. Another foster mother that also has my FFA social worker had a hearing in the same court room showed up and we sat and chatted. She had watched the baby last month when he was sick and couldn't go to daycare. She showed me a picture she had taken with him and her foster baby who is a month older than Jace, but double the size. She was sitting there waiting for a hearing to see if the baby will go live with a relative. (her hearing was after mine, but i found out he will be going to the relative today..i cant imagine what the family is going through.) It is now about 9am, and my social worker shows up. We all sit and chat, and wait. I was texting with people, and when i told Darby mother didn't show up, she said that the mother did show up, the egg donor didn't, i smiled. That was the truth!! My case was called second.
When i got into the court room, the baby's lawyer said that the mother's lawyer would enter a general objection(because he has to) and they are going to go forward and terminate the rights. I was excited, but wanted to wait to hear it from the judge, who wasn't the normal judge. As they go around the table submitting to the report, and changing language in the papers to reflect that "mother" has been absent, and not done minimal to get him back...First mom's lawyer asked for a continuance because he wanted to try to find her, and a general objection. The judge denied the continuance and went forward. At that moment, i started to cry. I actually hadn't expected it or even thought about my emotions. I was shocked, i looked at Becky and laughed quietly. The judge continued to go through the legal jargon, and when he got to actually saying that her rights are terminated, and that they had tried to find the father (listed in a section of the Sacramento Gazette, which i have never even heard of..but who cares) and that he couldn't come back and try to get him, that was it. They set another court date for a review in August, but the lawyer told me that if the adoption went through before that, it would just go away. And that was it...took a total of 10 minutes, and now this child is technically a legal orphan until i finalize the adoption in 2 months or so. Of course i had put on make up, so that was dripping down my cheek.
I walked out of the courtroom i think in shock. The other foster mother looked at me, and when i told her, she came and gave me a big hug and said congratulations, and that she was so happy she could be there for it. Becky gave me a hug, and i said to her, "call me to set up a date for you to come out next week." She laughed at me, and said she didn't care about that, and told me to go and celebrate. I left the court house, sunglasses on, and felt like i wanted to scream it out. instead i texted a bunch of people, and headed to work. How the heck was i going to concentrate...i did a few things, but wasn't horribly productive.
So now really all that is left is the formality of adoption. I walked into the daycare to pick him up and the director said she was so excited...and so did the teachers. So i guess this is the story of how i became a mother. LOL...It is so weird, i had been waiting for this, and here it is.
I still am not sure if i want/should post pictures...so i decided i will post this pic...
So the really tough stuff is over, i think. Again i arrived early at court (cuz i am a Hornstein) and i sit down in the lobby, alone for about 15 minutes. Every time the elevator bell rang, i looked, nothing. I did every thing i could to make sure that the mother, or father for that matter didn't walk out of one of those 3 elevators. Another foster mother that also has my FFA social worker had a hearing in the same court room showed up and we sat and chatted. She had watched the baby last month when he was sick and couldn't go to daycare. She showed me a picture she had taken with him and her foster baby who is a month older than Jace, but double the size. She was sitting there waiting for a hearing to see if the baby will go live with a relative. (her hearing was after mine, but i found out he will be going to the relative today..i cant imagine what the family is going through.) It is now about 9am, and my social worker shows up. We all sit and chat, and wait. I was texting with people, and when i told Darby mother didn't show up, she said that the mother did show up, the egg donor didn't, i smiled. That was the truth!! My case was called second.
When i got into the court room, the baby's lawyer said that the mother's lawyer would enter a general objection(because he has to) and they are going to go forward and terminate the rights. I was excited, but wanted to wait to hear it from the judge, who wasn't the normal judge. As they go around the table submitting to the report, and changing language in the papers to reflect that "mother" has been absent, and not done minimal to get him back...First mom's lawyer asked for a continuance because he wanted to try to find her, and a general objection. The judge denied the continuance and went forward. At that moment, i started to cry. I actually hadn't expected it or even thought about my emotions. I was shocked, i looked at Becky and laughed quietly. The judge continued to go through the legal jargon, and when he got to actually saying that her rights are terminated, and that they had tried to find the father (listed in a section of the Sacramento Gazette, which i have never even heard of..but who cares) and that he couldn't come back and try to get him, that was it. They set another court date for a review in August, but the lawyer told me that if the adoption went through before that, it would just go away. And that was it...took a total of 10 minutes, and now this child is technically a legal orphan until i finalize the adoption in 2 months or so. Of course i had put on make up, so that was dripping down my cheek.
I walked out of the courtroom i think in shock. The other foster mother looked at me, and when i told her, she came and gave me a big hug and said congratulations, and that she was so happy she could be there for it. Becky gave me a hug, and i said to her, "call me to set up a date for you to come out next week." She laughed at me, and said she didn't care about that, and told me to go and celebrate. I left the court house, sunglasses on, and felt like i wanted to scream it out. instead i texted a bunch of people, and headed to work. How the heck was i going to concentrate...i did a few things, but wasn't horribly productive.
So now really all that is left is the formality of adoption. I walked into the daycare to pick him up and the director said she was so excited...and so did the teachers. So i guess this is the story of how i became a mother. LOL...It is so weird, i had been waiting for this, and here it is.
I still am not sure if i want/should post pictures...so i decided i will post this pic...
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
One week
I can't believe it, on Friday the baby will be 5 months. In one week from now i will know if the mother's parental rights are terminated. What a roller coaster ride. Now i realize that this process for me has been fairly smooth. (Knock on wood, ie my head) and rarely does this happen like this, and for this i feel it means that we were meant to be together. Once the rights are terminated then she has 60 days to appeal, after that then i can apply to adopt. I am hoping this will happen by my birthday at the beginning of June.
So many emotions go into being a parent, but i feel like this court process has made it even worse. I feel super emotional right now, and even though i don't think there is a lot to worry about it is still the "what if" I hope that when this process is over, and he is officially mine, that i will be able to work with social workers and supervisors in the adoptions program to come up with a policy so that other social workers can do this. I feel like everyone is so worried about how it will look, and conflict of interest..blah blah blah....when really why aren't we asking what is best for the children. I think a social worker is one of the best people to adopt these children. There has to be a way that we can make this work in the long term. I hope that by doing this, others stop and think about it, and maybe one person will make the decision to adopt because of us.
I love that little boy..i love watching him grow, and become a little more independent, i love the huge smile i get when i pick him up from daycare, i even love the goofy laugh i get at 2am when i have to drag myself out of bed to get him. I wouldn't change a thing, and look forward to the day that he officially becomes mine.
So many emotions go into being a parent, but i feel like this court process has made it even worse. I feel super emotional right now, and even though i don't think there is a lot to worry about it is still the "what if" I hope that when this process is over, and he is officially mine, that i will be able to work with social workers and supervisors in the adoptions program to come up with a policy so that other social workers can do this. I feel like everyone is so worried about how it will look, and conflict of interest..blah blah blah....when really why aren't we asking what is best for the children. I think a social worker is one of the best people to adopt these children. There has to be a way that we can make this work in the long term. I hope that by doing this, others stop and think about it, and maybe one person will make the decision to adopt because of us.
I love that little boy..i love watching him grow, and become a little more independent, i love the huge smile i get when i pick him up from daycare, i even love the goofy laugh i get at 2am when i have to drag myself out of bed to get him. I wouldn't change a thing, and look forward to the day that he officially becomes mine.
Saturday, February 18, 2012
time moves so fast
When people tell you that times flies fast with children, they are not joking. I can close my eyes and see him off to college...LOL...OK, maybe not that far...This week he started to roll over. He hasn't been really doing it up until now. I have been helping him along, but all of sudden he was on his stomach by himself. the first day it was slow, but now as soon as you put him down, he rolls...unless of course his feet are not covered, then he has those. And he is sooooo close to putting them in his mouth. So funny to watch, he is so fixated on it. So now it begins. I put him down, he rolls and then he is moving. He turns on his tummy, i turn away and he is either facing the opposite direction, or on the other side of the blanket. He now has to be strapped in to his bouncy seat, because I turned around and he was almost off of it. And the jumparoo...OMG he loves it...
So the court hearing is March 7th, which is actually closer than i thought until just now. This is the termination of parental rights. The mother has 60 days to appeal it. It could go super smoothly or it can be dragged out because of trials and such. I really hope it doesn't go that way. After all that is over, we can go forward with the adoption. So that's where we are. I am going to keep this short, because i have a huge pile of laundry to fold.
So the court hearing is March 7th, which is actually closer than i thought until just now. This is the termination of parental rights. The mother has 60 days to appeal it. It could go super smoothly or it can be dragged out because of trials and such. I really hope it doesn't go that way. After all that is over, we can go forward with the adoption. So that's where we are. I am going to keep this short, because i have a huge pile of laundry to fold.
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